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Research is what I\'m doing when I don\'t know what I\'m doing.
Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
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Liberty and democracy become unholy when their hands are dyed red with innocent blood.
There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
A man can\'t get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.
C combines all the power of assembly language with the ease of use of assembly language
A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives.
Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It\'s the transition that\'s troublesome.
He managed to stupid himself right into the White House.
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Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso.
All our knowledge merely helps us to die a more painful death than animals that know nothing.
Everyone is a genius at least once a year; a real genius has his original ideas closer together.
It was God who made me so beautiful. If I weren\'t, then I\'d be a teacher.
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Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law?
Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.
There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread.
The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows.
We must all hear the universal call to like your neighbor like you like to be liked yourself.
I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.
Talent does what it can; genius does what it must.
The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.
My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn\'t take it out of my garden.
Outside of a dog, a book is man\'s best friend. Inside of a dog, it\'s too dark to read.
Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
Diplomacy is the art of saying \'Nice doggie!\'... \'til you can find a rock.
All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.
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Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
One doesn\'t have a sense of humor. It has you.
They have computers, and they may have other weapons of mass destruction.
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.
I invented the term Object-Oriented, and I can tell you I did not have C++ in mind.
I\'m living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.
The only one listening to both sides of an argument is the neighbor in the next apartment
A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.
Research is what I\'m doing when I don\'t know what I\'m doing.
The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
If people can judge me on the company I keep, they would judge me with keeping really good company with Laura.
You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
I\'m desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
What a cruel thing is war: to separate and destroy families and friends, and mar the purest joys and happiness God has granted us in this world; to fill our hearts with hatred instead of love for our neighbors, and to devastate the fair face of this beautiful world.
Deliver yesterday, code today, think tomorrow.
I hope life isn\'t a big joke ... because I don\'t get it.
There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.
I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.
Momma always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you\'re gonna get.
Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.
Never test for an error condition you don\'t know how to handle.
Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
Men are not disturbed by things, but the view they take of things.
The company doesn\'t tell me what to say, and I don\'t tell themwhere to stick it.
I\'d stop eating chocolate, but I\'m no quitter.
Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.
Biologically speaking, if something bites you it\'s more likely to be female.
It is better to be quotable than to be honest.
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For if he like a madman lived, At least he like a wise one died.
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Subtlety is the art of saying what you think and getting out of the way before it is understood.
Ah, you know the type. They like to blame it all on the Jews or the Blacks, \'cause if they couldn\'t, they\'d have to wake up to the fact that life\'s one big, scary, glorious, complex and ultimately unfathomable crapshoot -- and the only reason THEY can\'t seem to keep up is they\'re a bunch of misfits and losers.
I was raised in the West. The west of Texas. It\'s pretty close to California. In more ways than Washington, D.C., is close to California.
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.
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The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.
Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.
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There\'s no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.
I\'m living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn\'t.
I\'m living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.
Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it\'s the exact opposite.
Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.
They show you how detergents take out bloodstains. I think if you\'ve got a T-shirt with bloodstains all over it, maybe your laundry isn\'t your biggest problem.
Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.
A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done.
If the United Nations once admits that international disputes can be settled by using force, then we will have destroyed the foundation of the organization and our best hope of establishing a world order.
Everything secret degenerates, even the administration of justice.
In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it\'s the exact opposite.
Everywhere I go I\'m asked if I think the university stifles writers. My opinion is that they don\'t stifle enough of them.
The only one listening to both sides of an argument is the neighbor in the next apartment
Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.
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And God said, \'Let there be light\' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.
War doesn\'t make boys men, it makes men dead.
If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.
It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood... War is hell.
If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in.
I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it\'s fantastic.
Nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot.
That is the saving grace of humor, if you fail no one is laughing at you.
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.
A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.
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Don\'t stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
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To the Honourable Member opposite I say, when he goes home tonight, may his mother run out from under the porch and bark at him
An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.
The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.
I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.
If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
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When the rich think about the poor, they have poor ideas.
Where humor is concerned there are no standards - no one can say what is good or bad, although you can be sure that everyone will.
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If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and no-one dares criticize it.
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I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
I hate those men who would send into war youth to fight and die for them; the pride and cowardice of those old men, making their wars that boys must die.
I\'m all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let\'s start with typewriters.
Men have become the tools of their tools.
The belief in the possibility of a short decisive war appears to be one of the most ancient and dangerous of human illusions.
One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one\'s work is terribly important.
The only difference between me and a madman is that I\'m not mad.
I\'ve had a wonderful time, but this wasn\'t it.
We didn\'t lose the game; we just ran out of time.
Why was I with her? She reminds me of you. In fact, she reminds me more of you than you do!
The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.
Cholesterol is your natural defence against excessive circulation of blood, which can carry venoms, poisons and other toxins around your body.
Mr. Wagner has beautiful moments but bad quarters of an hour.
The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
Ah well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.
There\'s many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
You\'ll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.
In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear.
Research is what I\'m doing when I don\'t know what I\'m doing.
Quoting Coulter is kind of like quoting Joe McCarthy; no doubt it does well when you\'re pandering to a group of like-minded hate mongerers, but it earns you a well-deserved reputation as a vicious, mean-spirited airhead and intellecual lightweight in more analytical and dispassionate circles.
I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it\'s fantastic.
Anyone who starts a sentence, \'With all due respect ...\' is about to insult you.
The de facto role of the US armed forces will be to keep the world safe for our economy and open to our cultural assault.
Not even computers will replace committees, because committees buy computers.
They laughed when I said I\'d be a comedian. They aren\'t laughing now.
All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You\'d be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
2 + 2 = 5, for extremely large values of 2.
As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air ? however slight ? lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.
Always go to other people\'s funerals, otherwise they won\'t come to yours.
Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.
When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.
I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.
Having the source code is the difference between buying a house and renting an apartment.
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Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don\'t need to be done.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
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Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.
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Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is \'to be prepared\'.
Patriotism means to stand by the country. It does not mean to stand by the president or any other public official...
Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.
Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.
Maybe this world is another planet\'s Hell.
The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.
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Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
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Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.
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Liberty and democracy become unholy when their hands are dyed red with innocent blood.
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There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
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Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.
One doesn\'t have a sense of humor. It has you.
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A terrorist is someone who has a bomb, but doesn\'t have an air force.
TV is called a medium because it is neither rare nor well done.
We\'ve all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.
If Tyranny and Oppression come to this land, it will be in the guise of fighting a foreign enemy.
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
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Tact is the ability to tell a man he has an open mind when he has a hole in his head.
Premature optimization is the root of all evil.
Incrementing C by 1 is not enough to make a good object-oriented language.
Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones.
I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.
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He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
Don\'t stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame.
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We will not learn how to live together in peace by killing each other\'s children.
We need either less corruption or more chance to participate in it.
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.
The purpose of computing is not numbers but insight.
You got to be careful if you don\'t know where you\'re going, because you might not get there.
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The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There\'s also a negative side
The cry has been that when war is declared, all opposition should be hushed. A sentiment more unworthy of a free country could hardly be propagated.
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.
Only one man ever understood me, and he didn\'t understand me.
Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.
Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-Box.
Three o\'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time.
The only way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.
Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
No mention of God. They keep Him up their sleeves for as long as they can, vicars do. They know it puts people off.
Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
Before C++ we had to code all of our bugs by hand; now we inherit them.
Humor is also a way of saying something serious.
Maybe there is no actual place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen to our grandparents breathe through their noses when they\'re eating sandwiches.
I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.
If there?s one thing I know it?s God does love a good joke.
Misunderstandings and neglect create more confusion in this world than trickery and malice. At any rate, the last two are certainly much less frequent.
If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
If women didn\'t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called \'Ego\'.
The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a \'C\', the idea must be feasible.
I\'m living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
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Don\'t be so humble - you are not that great.
The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.
If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track
In this war ? as in others ? I am less interested in honoring the dead than in preventing the dead.
I\'ve never seen anyone change his mind because of the power of a superior argument or the acquisition of new facts. But I\'ve seen plenty of people change behavior to avoid being mocked.
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
In America, anybody can be president. That\'s one of the risks you take.
Lohr\'s Law: The future is merely the past with a twist ? and better tools.
We\'ve all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.
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We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?
Write a wise word and your name will live forever.
Raymond\'s Law of Software: Given a sufficiently large number of eyeballs, all bugs are shallow.
Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.
If it weren\'t for electricity we\'d all be watching television by candlelight.
Marry me and I\'ll never look at another horse!
The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
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To understand a man you should walk a mile in his shoes. If what he says still bothers you that\'s ok because you\'ll be a mile away from him and you\'ll have his shoes.
It is better to be quotable than to be honest.
Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones.
The covers of this book are too far apart.
Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.
There\'s many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
It\'s wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago.
Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.
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The nice thing about egotists is that they don\'t talk about other people.
As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air ? however slight ? lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.
I hate those men who would send into war youth to fight and die for them; the pride and cowardice of those old men, making their wars that boys must die.
Subtlety is the art of saying what you think and getting out of the way before it is understood.
Don\'t knock masturbation, it\'s sex with someone I love .
Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven\'t said enough.
最終更新日 : 2012/01/20/(Fri) 08:40
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